Mental Meandering on a Difficult Decision

Terrance Boult

I'm faced these days with a difficult choice:
a soaring career or plain simple life.
I normally listen to my inner voice,
but on this it seems silent. So does my wife!
I will pen a few lines as my mind does drift.
Exploring my feelings from different views.
Since putting rhymes together gives me a lift,
it 's worth while work even if there 's no news.

If family comes first will I go stir crazy?
If career is chosen, will love slip away?
Will my career go south?  Will I grow lazy?
Can I be a good father every day?
Will my love keep on growing all of my life?
Can I sit back and work only 9 to 5?
Will I always be there for my kid and wife?
Do I need mental work to know I'm alive?

I don't know all the answers. One, though, I do.
Decarte was close with `` I think therefore I am'',
But ``I feel therefore I am'' is much more true.
Thoughts depend on feelings as wool does a lamb.
The wool, once removed, makes a wonderful thread
which, like thoughts,  are woven into fabrics fair.
But no wool is there if the lamb 's sick or dead.
so too are thoughts nothing if feelings aren't there.

So this, the first digression, ends with the rhyme
	Love and feelings are prime!
	Think in ones spare time.

I need to be active in many a way.
I crave stimulation -- the mind growing kind.
But families need care, need you there ev'ry day,
wives need attention -- all the love you can find.
The job offers action, a real mental  rush
room to excel and exploring new places.
But love makes my mind like a magical mush,
exploring new heights as my heart it races.

As my age does creep up, my mind will slow down.
I'll become out of date, my knowledge arcane
Where I once was brilliant, my light will be brown
I'll find my lust for knowledge, with age, does wane.
A simple family life is one of the heart
with electrical highs and gut wrenching lows.
It is a commitment for life, once you do start.
But with T L C for a lifetime it grows.

Comparing potentials is so hard to do.
A plain simple life is full of ups and downs.
The career has its good points; its bad ones too.
But while a job is finite, love knows no bounds.
Still, the job is much safer -- much less to lose.
I'm not sure how I'd take it if love went wrong.
From the high points its family, love that I'd choose.
the career may be safe short but love lasts long.

This second direction echoes back the chime:
	Love and family are prime!  
	The job 's for spare time.

I can live to work, or I can work to live.
Though I could be quite happy with either path,
a definitive answer I can not give
'cause I'm not quite certain of the aftermath.
If life has no purpose, then I can not loose
but if life has a meaning, some goal I've missed
the lost could be plenty, and thus do I muse
If either path, perchants,  could leave some god pissed.

If one thinks of betting god doesn't exist,
compute all your risks with the utmost of care.
Watch for the zero times infinity twist,
this ill defined term is oft hiding in there.
If you know how the chance of a deity
is tending to zero, you have one more a chore.
Is the limit that tends to eternity 
countable, aleph naught or something much more?

In the teachings I've studied over  the years
Most talked of sharing,  caring for all mankind
Most talked much of love, but few talk of careers
Most played down things of a material kind.
They stress give not get, work not wealth, ours not mine.
One or two might be wrong. But not  over ninety  nine?
This is the safest view on how I should live
ask not what I get from it, but what I give.

This ends my meandering on winged words 
each direction driven by meter and rhyme
Trice the tune twas tweeted by deep seated birds:
	Love and family are prime!  
	Work in ones spare time.